What was it t hat made me leave the day I did? What was the tipping point that made you finally leave? I am asked questions like that every day.

The day I left was no different than any other day. The abuse was no different. The only difference was that he was not home that day.

It was like “an out of body” experience. I saw a woman packing a bag, I saw her closing the door behind her suitcase in hand and off I went to my mother’s. When I arrived at my mother’s completely unannoun...

I have been depressed these past few days and I know why-my plan that I have is not moving fast enough for me. Yes I know I have little victories everyday but for some reason for the past few days I just want to get to the finish line. Rather than being grateful for what I do have I am mired in what I “perceive” I don’t have. Not a good thing. In fact, I have been so mired in my “bad stuff” that I have upset someone who I love very much.  And I regret that very much.

Yet there is g...

No matter how good my life is I sometimes have this little voice in my head telling me “be careful”. It seems I am always waiting for “the other shoe to drop”. I still assume that all the good in my life will just one day disappear.

For so many years I did live a life where “the shoe dropped” everyday and yes those days are long gone- but obviously not in my head. I still battle with irrational thoughts that some unknown bad will come into my life and all that I have worked for ...

My dad told me so many times as I was growing up that he wanted me to be a teacher. He thought being a teacher was a great profession for a woman. Yes teaching is an honorable profession but not for the reasons dad wanted me to become one.

Dad wanted me to be a teacher because he assumed I would get married one day (he was correct there) but he thought that being a teacher would allow me to be home early and take care of the children (I never had any) and have supper on the table when my hu...

My ex-husband fought me for two years before he would agree to a divorce. We had no children and no money yet he battled me every step of the way - and I know why.

Some might think that he loved me and wanted to make a go of the marriage but that was the furthest reason from the truth. He wanted to maintain his lifestyle. I was the major wage earner and he was a gambler. Without me he would not be able to do what he wanted and what he wanted was for me to work so he could pursue his gambling...

Every organization has jobs that are necessary but at the same time are thankless and tedious. I was the queen of thankless and tedious jobs. If there was a division that no one wanted I said bring it on, if there was a division that was performing poorly and no one wanted to touch I said bring it on.  I would gladly take on what no one else wanted because that was my way of trying to ensure that I would not lose my job.

I was the major wage earner and I had to be sure that I was never out ...

I always wanted a "dad." I wanted a dad who would talk to me, give me advice, hug me, take me places and make me feel special. I never had that and I would constantly complain about it to my therapist. Finally one day after having again bemoaned that my dad was never present for me my therapist cut me off and abruptly told me "get over it, you never had a real dad and that is not going to change". She suggested that I become the “good parent” to myself.

That stated me on a path of takin...