Domestic Violence and Computer Security        Are You Safe?     If Not EXIT THIS SITE NOW 

Nancy's Blog 

Welcome to My Blog

I write here twice each week - Tuesday and Thursday.

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Nancy Salamone

Author and Speaker
Advocate Against Domestic Violence


Founder  of The Business of Me

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If you are in danger, please:

Call 911

Call your local hotline

Call a national hotline:
U.S. National Domestic Violence Hotline at
1-800-799-7233 (SAFE) or
TTY at 1-800-787-3224

U.S. National Sexual Assault Hotline at
1-800-656-4673
This automatically connects you to a local U.S. rape crisis program
near your phone number's area code.

U.S. National Teen Dating Violence Helpline at
1-866-331-9474

Why I Blog 

I am Nancy Salamone. I’m a survivor of domestic violence. 

For 20 years I kept a secret from my family and co-workers. The secret was that I was physically, emotionally and economically abused by my husband. I kept this secret for 20 years - because I was ashamed.

Then on December 28, 1991 I left.  To this day I do not know the Nancy who left but I will always be grateful to that person inside me who summoned the courage to leave.

I blog here so that I might tell you my story so that women who are in a domestic violent relationship, or those who are struggling with the decision to leave - or who have made the decision to leave, know that there is a way out no matter how long it takes.

I hope that you learn from my story that not only is there a way out but – you too can create the life you want.

You are not alone!

 

 
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Fear Creates….

April 9, 2012

 

A friend of mine Stan Hustad (http://www.stanhustad.com/) says “Fear Kills Everything”. It kills your creativity - it saps your energy - it kills your logic. I know I have suffered from fear and it paralyzed me.

 

What I did not realize about fear is that it creates, according to a mentor of Stan’s, anger and selfishness. Wow! As I reflect on times when I am fearful I tend to lash out to those around me rather than face my fears. And yes I do become selfish – I don’t want to help anyone – I just want to retreat into my fear.

 

I have recently been faced with something that caused me a lot of fear. But this time rather than avoid and retreat I have faced it head-on – and I feel better. I don’t know how it will turn out but I will not allow the fear of what I think might happen consume me.

Posted 5 weeks ago

Real Heroines – Celebrating Women’s History Month

March 31, 2012

 

Today is the last day of Women’s History Month and while I don’t normally blog on weekends I could not let Women’s History Month pass and not comment.

 

Domestic violence has affected millions of women over many generations. It is women who have been at the forefront combating this social disease. These women don’t look for fame or fortune- they are doing what they believe is right and that is to help other women break the cycle of violence in their lives.

 

To all those women, whose names we don’t know, I thank you for your devotion in helping other women stay safe.

Posted 6 weeks ago

In Defense Of All Women

March 12, 2012

On Friday night I tuned into the Bill Maher show ‘Real Time ‘on HBO.  During his show there was a discussion of the vile way Rush Limbaugh treated Sandra Fluke. Mr. Maher defended Mr. Limbaugh by telling liberals in a tweet “Hate to defend #Rush Limbaugh but he apologized, liberals looking bad not accepting. Also hate intimidation by sponsor pullout.” Mr. Maher seems an unlikely defender of Rush Limbaugh, but is he?

During his show the conversation turned to the fact Mr. Maher called Sarah Palin the C-word. He rationalized it by stating he called her the C-word during his stand up show and admitted to having “potty” mouth. 

Let me be clear, I am no fan of Sarah Palin. I do not agree with her on almost everything and I truly don’t like her. She has willingly put herself on the public stage and earns her living by being a protagonist in the public square.  There are many in the main stream media (or lame stream media as Sarah calls any media outlet that isn’t Fox News) who let her know she is a political lightweight - too bad Sarah it comes with the territory and you are paid handsomely.  

I have no issue with her detractors when they call her a political moron or unintelligent.  But she does not deserve to be called the C-word just as Sandra Fluke does not deserve to be called a slut or prostitute or any of the other vile words Mr. Limbaugh used. 

It seems Bill Maher and Rush Limbaugh are no different - both have used vile terms to “bring down” women they do not agree with – and all women regardless of our political affiliation should be outraged by both of them! 

Posted 9 weeks ago

Browsing Archive: May, 2011

A Wise Woman

Posted by Nancy Salamone on Friday, May 27, 2011, In : About Nancy's Story 

Many of you know that when I worked on Wall Street I had an assistant for a number of years. Wilma is no nonsense, straight talking Latina with a heart of gold. She became my defender, confident and a life long friend whose advice I cherish.

 

I woke up today thinking about Wilma and some of her “sayings”. Wilma would always say “When you are feeling your worst you should look your best.” She was right about that. When I was going through my divorce there were many days where I felt...


Continue reading ...
 

Small Bundle Of Happiness

Posted by Nancy Salamone on Thursday, May 26, 2011, In : About Nancy's Story 

When I was a child my Dad brought home a puppy. My sister and I were so excited and thrilled to have a puppy but our excitement was short lived. The active little puppy was obviously not house-trained and my Mom scared the little thing to death by chasing it around with a broom. The poor little puppy was so scared that it did “its business” all over the house which incited my Mom even more – these were the days before “wee-wee” pads.  The next morning when my sister and I woke up th...


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Safety Planning

Posted by Nancy Salamone on Monday, May 9, 2011, In : About Nancy's Story 

Recently a number of women have reached out to me and told me about their struggles with domestic violence. The women who have contacted me are still in those abusive relationships and were seeking advice on what they should do so they can leave their abusers.

Each woman had the same concern – money. It is important to start putting aside “escape” money. Put aside money that only you know about and can use to get out in a hurry, if you need to. Open a bank account in your name only an...


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I Am Whole Complete And Perfect!

Posted by Nancy Salamone on Tuesday, May 3, 2011, In : About Nancy's Story 

Yesterday I read this quote “Stress, worry, and anxiety simply come from projecting your thoughts into the future and imagining something bad. This is focusing on what you don't want! If you find that your mind is projecting into the future in a negative way, focus intensely on NOW. Keep bringing yourself back to the present.”

This sounds so simple and easy but it’s not. I know that when my mind goes to those “dark” places I have to really stop all I am doing and really work on ge...


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