Recently a number of women have reached out to me and told me about their struggles with domestic violence. The women who have contacted me are still in those abusive relationships and were seeking advice on what they should do so they can leave their abusers.

Each woman had the same concern – money. It is important to start putting aside “escape” money. Put aside money that only you know about and can use to get out in a hurry, if you need to. Open a bank account in your name only and in a bank that your abuser does not use.  Hide money in a place no one except you knows about or will be able to find.

Get debit and credit cards in your own name. When I left my ex-husband I opened new banking and credit card accounts and used my work address so he would not find out.

Gather all important documents and remove them from the house. Items like birth certificates for you and your children, marriage license, deeds or leases in your name or both your names, copies of any police reports or medical reports of past incidents. Copies of any financial documents like bank accounts, investments and pension plan documents also need to be in a safe place outside of the house.

Purchase a “pay as you go” phone with money you have set aside, do not use a credit or debit card that your abuser controls.

And most important I tell them to call the National Domestic Violence Hotline 1-800-799-7233 for guidance and help.